On Saturday night, I indulged in my top top activity of all time. I went to see some fireworks. I have very few things that I am anally retentive about (you should see the state of my bedroom!) but how one watches a firework display is very important. Here are my viewing rules:
1 It is a communal event, necessitating a crowd. It is not the same watching from your house, by yourself. You must be able to 'ooh' and 'aaah' in all the right bits, and enjoy feeling part of some primeval human response to loud noise and bright colours.
2 Linked to this, you must be outdoors. Watching through a screen of any kind, such as a glass window, takes away from the purity of the experience. An ex-boyfriend of mine, whom I will call Jean-Claude (he was French, I'm not being madly poncey), once tried to avoid taking me to see fireworks by arguing we could see many displays from his (high rise) flat. Yes, as small, dull lights in the distance, through a window!! Not the same AT ALL. I yelled and cried and FORCED him to take me to the Eiffel Tower to see a proper display.
3 You must be able to see the whole display. Arriving late, hurrying along, watching sideways, all detracts.
4 It is preferably cold. I will indulge in fireworks anywhere (and am v keen on seeing the NYE ones in Sydney) but fireworks in mid-summer does feel strange to me.
5 The whole experience is enhanced by the following: sparklers (monster ones!); flashing lights; toffee apples; mulled wine.
6 Watching fireworks on TV is anathema (see point 2). It simply reminds you of what you are missing. Better one solitary green rocket in a back garden than a £1,000,000 display on television (as I had last NYE in fact).
7 While not all firework displays are equal, all of them should be appreciated for their inherent aesthetic beauty and thrilling appeal. At a post fireworks gathering, Steve opined he thought Blackheath's fireworks rather disappointing this year. No such thing. They are always fabulous.
8 Having said that, the ideal display should be a mix of high flying fireworks and ground ones. We never seem to see Catherine Wheels or those flaying head ones any more.
9. I slightly drunkenly opined at gathering that watching fireworks is better than sex. My friend Marty whom I had been watching the fireworks with suggested that I should try having sex while a firework display was going on, and see how I coped with that particular combination. It would have to be a position where I could see the sky, obviously, but maybe I will try this next year! (though see point 3: I don't know if I would enjoy it really). Actually I have in the past chosen fireworks over sex. Yet another ex boyfriend Bertrand wanted us to stay in bed togther and have sex to mark the Millennium!! As if! There were fireworks going on. I went to see the fireworks with some friends, and I don't know what he did, and quite frankly, it wouldn't have been as good.
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